MY DAD BEAT ME UP ON MY BIRTHDAY

IT'S MY BIRTHDAY!!!! This is not happy occasion for me.

Every year one week after my birthday something bad will happen to me, usually it involves with my father brutally beating me up until I scream bloody murder, and usually I suppress my emotions. I try my best to talk to my father about these things but he always prioritizes himself and disregard other people's emotions. Anyways, today I'll be tackling about my Birthday jinx.

I don't know when this birthday jinx started but it has been going on for quite a while, sometimes it would skip a year, but there's always a rebound in the other holidays. The first time I felt the birthday jinx is when I was 13 and we were living in our old house. I was in 7th grade by that time and I've been hooked to Minecraft because of peer pressure. My father called me from downstairs to help him with some chore he had to do, and afraid of a beating I went down. He told me to look for the bleach under the messy counter (which is full of his disgusting items). I was wearing my glasses but they were slipping off, and there was no light so I couldn't see it when I bent down. My father kept on saying 'there, there' as if it would help. He got to the point that he had enough of my blindness, he bent down, grabbed the bottle of the 1 liter bleach (still full) and smashed it in my head. I felt myself going out cold. I got angry, rushed out, and didn't bother to come back. I was missing a slipper but I didn't care, my head was pounding.

10 minutes later my brother came looking for me, shirtless, but I didn't want to be seen, I wanted to cool off so I hid from him. After an hour, I felt something click in my head (probably a mild concussion) and went to my nearest grandma (I have a lot of relatives in Manila). I was crying by the time I went to her store, she hugged me telling me that my father has been looking for me and my mom even went home to work early afraid something bad will happen. My mom came to pick me up, but we didn't went to my other grandma (my father's mom) and told me to stay there. My grandma hugged me and told me to sleep for the night, she instructed my cousin to clean my wounds and clean the blood off my head.

The day ended with me returning home, my father hugging me sobbingly (he didn't say sorry tho, the fuck?) and I got to eat for the first time that day.

This happened one week after my birthday, but there's a worse situation that happened on my birthday.

I moved into a new school because I've encountered problems in my old school, I kept in touch with my old friends but it couldn't be helped when we had sort of a fallout (they got angry that I couldn't keep up with their activities). To avoid me being labeled a jerk I invited them to eat in a pizza place near our school, I also invited my new friends. It got awkward. My new friends were dissing one another and I didn't got a chance to communicate with my old friends because they're at the end of the table. To be fair, I was taking my new friends' side because my old friends got angry at me for something petty.

After the whole debacle, I went home with my old friends and my uncle (who is uninvited but my father invited), and they lashed out their problems at me.

This story happened when I was turning 14, my father wasn't involved in this one. I was in a really empty place and I couldn't feel happy anymore. I was in this identity crisis state and on my birthday I did nothing but cry until the tears went out. The jinx here is more of a personal thing, but I consider it as a jinx because it heightened in my birthday.

Now let's move on when I was turning 15, I already posted this story, basically the gist is: it was my birthday and we have been evicted from our old house, so we had to move in on my birthday. While this is happening my group mates were telling me to buy catnip for our Scientific Investigatory Project, so I had to scour three malls just to cover my group mate's mistake (~cough~ ~Bern~ ~cough~). In the end I found nothing and I got so angry that I took it out of our Science professor because I wasn't good in words and confrontation is not my thing back then.

This is the last part of the birthday jinx, and hopefully the end. If you're a viewer from my old blog 'Lossng Weight' then you've already read the story. One week after I turned 16, my father told me to arrange all the clothes in my closet, since he just bought chicken and no one from my family had eaten that day yet, he told me to arrange my clothes after we ate. After eating, I was watching a Disney sitcom (probably, not sure), and I forgot to arrange my clothes. I heard him marching from downstairs and out of nowhere he punched me in the chest. He got angry at me and told me to arrange my clothes. I got up from the computer chair and went to my room to fix my clothes. While fixing he kept on telling me how I'm such a burden, how I'm no longer doing anything to contribute in this house, how I'm such a selfish person, all of my insecurities. It was annoying, then my mom pressured him to go in their room and sleep. After finishing arranging my clothes I contacted my classmates (we needed to go to a Science exhibit for our Science class) and I told them that I am having trouble breathing and that I might skip it. I tried crying but I didn't felt any tears because I suppressed all of my emotions (I wonder when they're all going to come out).

I got pissed at everything, I told my classmates that I'll be there, they were confused, seeing how troubled I was when I get there. Me and my father didn't spoke with each other for a week, and when we did, he never said sorry AGAIN. smh.

There you guys go, this is my birthday jinx.. Hopefully I wouldn't need to edit this one week later.


[edit 10/12/17:I just created a Facebook page, make sure you like it!!!]